Brothers & Sisters,

Happy Xmas (war is closer): but at least we’ll be all right for oil. All Uncle Sam wants for Christmas are the Stans: we can afford the human sacrifice, can’t we? Dirty bomb paranoia. Ferry watch. Loads to do this festive period. Why not pick up one of our off the shelf gas & chemical protection combi-masks: a snip at £39.99 (they turn the bedroom gimp into a red hot S&M monster!).

Turn that light out! Don’t you know there’s a war on? Saddam’s highly developed weapons of mass destruction can pick off a sprout on the edge of a kitchen work surface from Babylon (& ting!). George Bush’s weapons of mass distraction can move the eyes of a hemisphere off the ball long enough to knobble the UN referee.

Peace on earth & goodwill to all men: except Arabs, Iraqians, Iranians & anyone else with better natural resources. 2 billion dollars a day, that’s what it costs to prop W up. How long till a new overdraft facility has to be arranged?

Compulsive bullshit disorders, mass ignorance & Captain Apathy rule. How do they keep a straight face when they read the autocue? Of course, it’s all the firemen’s fault. Going on strike for a realistic living wage at this delicate & dangerous juncture is tantamount to joining The Elite Republican Guard. I wouldn’t get out of a burning bed for less than 30K a year. Would you?

Still, at least we’ve got the Queen’s speech to look forward to this year. Happy fucking Christmas.

Jean Encoule –

contact - the needle & the damage done